This is the public diary of

Cando von der Jonasburg

Travelling is educational.

You got it in one, didn't you. I did my first serious bit of travelling over Easter. But don't you think I enjoyed it all! Actually most of it I didn't, I think, apart from the Easter bunny bit, but that I'll tell you later.
Let's start at the beginning:
(Hey, how is that for an opener? Got you hooked, eh?)

Everything started on a Friday, so I've been told. To tell you the truth, I had to ask about the name of the day. See at my age - pre-school - you don't care so much about what day it is today. Come to think of it, it might not even be a question of age. Naming days might be a solely human notion with no meaning at all to the real world. They probably invented it so that they can set deadlines before they start bombing each other. Strange game, I say.- But back to my life:
Friday when Gene came from school, he started taking things out of warderobes and asked me not to run my nose through them.

Then we fetched Monika from work and they both disappeared into the sauna for a couple of hours. That I like because it gives me time to lie down in peace and do some serious thinking.
What I disliked was that they'd given me food for thought before they went and that was my only food that evening. Do you understand me? They actually took away my leftovers which I had planned on consuming later that night. Thus I lay wondering whether they finally started to turn nasty and starve me to death while having a ball in the sauna. I never really found out what that was all about.

However, the next morning we all enjoyed a lie-in. With me not having taken any pees indoors in a long while, I luckily get a chance to sleep as long as I want to on weekends. Then I got a tap on the back for breakfast and a long walk through the woods for lunch. By now I was quite certain they were going to starve me so I picked some grass here and a couple of leaves there. Not much though, just enough to keep my stomach going. See, I'm not really the salad-bar-kind-of-guy.

Late in the afternoon they put me in the back of the car and then they chased along German autobahns at a speed that must have been even faster than that damn bird I couldn't catch in our garden last week. Three times they stopped and gave me a chance to stretch. (What else can you do when you're not properly fed I ask you.) Then they stopped in front of a house and introduced me to some strange folks who wanted to pad me and say hello and what have you. (I still hate people bending over to pad me on the head and all.) So I started barking and didn't stop in a while.
Finally I got something to eat again, but mind you, I did not touch any of their offerings! If they think I'm totally dependend on them then they better think again and quickly. I officially refused food for a week! Okey, not really for a week, I mean I only ate sort of half of my daily ration and some of my favourites like boiled potatoes and old bread rolls which the strangers kept giving me on the side. I think they tried to bribe me into something, but I'm still not sure what. I didn't quite understand their dialect, Upper-Austrian, whatever that might be.
Great was that I got to sleep in the same room as Monika and Gene. For a full week I could prove to them that I'm a great companian even by night (but they kicked me out of their bedroom the day we returned). Any movement the strangers did during our first night and I was up and barked quickly to let Gene know that he might have to come and kill one of them. But as he didn't think of getting up his you-know-what I gave up the alarm bark during our second night. What good is a bark if everyone refuses to hear you!?

With all my new teeth out now I feel really matured. Not only can a bite and go into a serious tug of war whenever I like, I can also climb all sorts of stairs now, carpeted or not, see-through or not. I enjoyed Gene coaxing me with food up and down various staircases. It was a great game: the more I pretended I was afraid of taking any more steps the bigger the size of the goody got. Gene put up signs outside the house and garden fence with a warning of the dog and a picture of a mature Hovaward. I tell you it works. Whenever anyone rings the door bells or walks onto our grounds I bark and everyone looks at the picture and stops dead. That picture and my voice keep anyone away. How can they know that I'm only 26 kg now.
More and more people start coming to our house all of which I greet with a bark or two thousand millions. One of these ladies I had once met before at our favourite Greek restaurant some weeks ago bend over and said: "How lovely. He must be fully grown now." Stupid peops, Stavros would say! I've only had some five months of growth now and I still have some thirteen more to go.

Before I go today, I have to tell you there is no Easter bunny, there are hundreds of them! I saw them in Upper-Austria in the fields. They were frolicking in the sun two by two. And I was not allowed to have a single one. It's a hard life!